Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Late Night Thought: The Map of Life

Disclaimer: this may be full of cheesy, obvious ideas. But it's what is on my mind, and I can't seem to let it go...
Lately, I can't stop thinking about where I am right now. Literally. Where I am standing at any given moment and how I got there. What steps I had to take, what turns I had to make, what paths or shortcuts got me there. I'm thinking about everything I've accomplished and even all the chances I didn't take. I'm thinking about how I got to making (or not making) those decisions. I'm thinking about life as a map.

To me, life is this cheesy, stereotypical map with an infinite amount of paths, shortcuts, side roads, and detours. If you take one path, it will lead you to different paths than if you had taken a different path from the beginning. I've been dwelling for a few years on all the paths that I didn't take, rather I should have been focusing on what happened to get me where I am.

The people along the way.
The things I felt along the way.
The experiences I encountered first hand.
The things I saw. The things I did. The things I never saw until now and the things that for some reason, I never did.
Every single thing in life that I did AND didn't do influenced my life choices and decisions.

It's like a snowball effect; when this happens, it triggers this action, and keeps building up. That buildup? Your LIFE.

It's crazy how these things work out. It's just as crazy how they don't work out. Sometimes they can even be ironic.

I haven't lived as much as I could have by now. I may not have experienced as much as others who are at the same checkpoint as me. We've lived differently, and sometimes I feel like I've lived even more differently than most.

Then, there's him. We have things in common. We obviously get along well. We're similar people; we understand each other like no one else I know. Yet we took two of the most different paths ever....and we wound up at the same place. With each other.

It's ironic. The things we both had to do, the things we both had to experience, the two completely different lives we had to leave brought us to each other. At the right time. And quite honestly, it's exactly what we needed.

You can't help but think about what would have happened if you hadn't done something along the way, good or bad. It definitely would have influenced a thing or two. But maybe everything happened because it needed to. Maybe this domino hit that one just right.

Photo Via (We Heart It)


Chris said...

This is amazing Jessi, absolutly amazing. I love the fact that it is so blatently honest about us living two different lives, but coming together at exactly the right time, and frankly it is exactly what we needed, at exactly the right time. This is quite an amazing blog post, it truly is.

Lydia said...

Great post, and your final line is genius!

Jen said...

I really like this Jessi :)

It's really poignant.

Ashton King said...

I really enjoyed reading this :)

Ashton King said...

I really enjoyed reading this :)

fizzleh said...

Thanks for sharing this, I know exactly what you mean. I've been thinking a lot about my life lately as well. Sometimes I think that it would be sorta neat to see what my life would be like if I hadn't made some of the choices I've made. But I guess there's really no way to figure that out. Life just happens the way life happens, there's no going back. It's definitely something to think about when you're making new choices. How is this going to effect the rest of my life?

claire said...

Hey! I tagged you here:

Keda said...

it's not regret, it's just ... thinking, I suppose. I never regret who I am now and therefore it is impossible for me to regret my past because it would change who I am. But I do wonder, and suppose and imagine...

And then I also believe that everything in the world conspired to make things the way they are now and that this given moment is exactly as it should be.

But dreams are allowed aren't they? Or would it be rememberings, even though it never happened because it is in the past?


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