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Thursday, August 19, 2010

An Open Letter to the Senior Year Jessi

Hey punk,

It's like I'm stepping back in time. Just a little less than a week and you're going to begin your sophomore year of college. Big things are in store for this year, after the most epic summer of your life. You knew on January 1st that this was going to be your year. Let's keep this momentum going, okay?

But back to high school. You're a senior again. Sigh, I know... You're rocking the high school newspaper and dreaming of getting away. You want to quit your less-than-awesome job, go to your dream school, and leave everything and everyone at home. You want to get away. But I'm here to tell you one thing - - open your eyes.

In your senior year of high school, I know the last thing you want to do is stay at home and attend community college. I know that in your hometown, it's even considered an embarrassing option.

I also know that you want to use getting away as your escape from all the drama you've created or gotten yourself into. But guess what? You're gonna stay and deal with it. No running away for you, missy. Not only can you not afford to run away money-wise, but you also can't afford to emotionally. There's too much at stake.

Nearing the end of your senior year, I know that things are tougher than they've ever been. You've been stabbed in the back by almost everyone and you're sick of the same old shit. But I'm Jessi of the Future, like a ghost, and I'm here to tell you that I know from experience that staying here is the best thing that ever happened to you. Yes, living at home and going to community college is the greatest thing you could have done, and you did it.

Good for you.

You stayed here, and you dealt with it. You put up with the hardships. You dealt with your problems, you dealt with things way beyond your maturity level. But I can say that you were rewarded, so to speak. Things looked up, and changed.

After the hell that was the last few months of senior year and the summer after, the tables turned. You
will learn to accept that you're here to stay for a while, and you'll learn to adapt...even if it's in the place you've been all along. You'll adapt like you never have before. You'll put up with any of the day-to-day drama, pain, or bullshit that remains here. You'll come out a lot stronger than if you had run away from these problems.

Then you fell in love. You fell hard, and it was someone that was there. Someone that you almost ran from. But you're so happy now. Staying here was the best decision of your life.

Love gave you backbone. Life gave you backbone. Work and the success you discovered from it gave you backbone.

Hell, if you had gone to an expensive university right off the bat, who knows if you'd be where I sit today? Working on articles for the local paper, blogging for the masses, and holding hands with the only one who really gets you. Being so....happy.

So don't consider the Navy anymore. It's not for you. Stop day-dreaming about that far-away university. You can't afford to go, and you can't afford to miss out on what's been right in front of you, what's been here all along. Open your eyes and realize that things are tough now, but I know for a fact that in this moment is right where you need to be. And while it's not everything you've imagined in your dreams, it's so much better. It's everything you need.

Love,
Me

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3 comments:

Kat Swan said...

I want to thank you for this letter. I'm sure this was therapeutic for you and it reminded me that it's okay that life isn't going the way I wanted my life to go. So I might not be able to run from small town, USA but your letter made me feel okay about it. I love how you said "in this moment is right where you need to be."
You've inspired me to write my own letter to myself.
Thank you for the inspiration and the assurance to live in the now.

Jessi Haish said...

I'm so glad you were able to get something from this. It was pretty therapeutic for me :) Good luck with your own letter to yourself.

Ashton King said...

This was very inspiring, especially since I'm from what amounts to a peanut field on steroids. I've kind of gotten out... I'm 30 minutes up the road in a medium-sized city-town that's built in a circle. I love small towns (aside from the drama, lol) and all the great small-town things they have to offer. It builds character!

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