Thursday, October 21, 2010

The Husband, The Dog, and the 2.5 Kids

Our American expectations. I've never been one to want the 'American Dream.' I've never been one to want what this country has always advertised as our selling factors. But for some reason, I feel like it will happen to me much like it has happened to everyone else.

Maybe I won't be as wealthy as we all fantasize to be (or think that we are.) Maybe I won't have the huge house, but I'll have the decent two-story. With a white picket fence. Even though that's something I've never demanded, maybe I'll wind up with it.

Maybe someday I'll find myself with the husband who's home for dinner every night at 5:30. Maybe he'll scoop up our average of 2.5 kids and pat the family dog on the head. Maybe that's what's awaiting me.

Maybe I'll wind up with all of these things. Though like most, I never spent my childhood daydreaming about these things. I never fantasized about the wedding dress and the cake and the little flower girls. I just saw me doing something. I still don't know what that something is.

But I pictured myself as completely self-sufficient. Some may say I pictured myself as the lone, single, spinster type, but I just never imagined a family. I still haven't considered it. I still see myself as the self-sufficient person. I still don't see that big house with the fence and the roses. I just don't fit this American Dream.

Is it even the American Dream anymore? Do kids still let their minds wander about having 2.5 kids and a protective husband who comes home every night to a clean house? Do girls still fantasize about their wedding and their pure white dress, or has the game really changed?

Am I just one who only thinks about the daunting task of finding success in this world, personally and professionally, before anything else? Or is life going to get in the way and make everything simply 'norm?' Does anyone really fit the American Dream anymore?

photo via (we heart it)


Grace said...

Good topic. I don't think I crave that american dream either. I don't even want a two story house. And I definitely see myself as wanting to be self-sufficient. Maybe we're unique :)I like to challenge norms anyways. I still have no idea if I even want to have kids.

Melissa Blake said...

Awesome post! I used to want the American Dream, but now I just want to be happy. In whatever I'm doing.

Molly said...

This is one of my favorite posts that you've written in awhile. I also like the image you used. It's hard to say whether I want the "American Dream" or not. Up until a few months ago, I was worried I would never find the perfect guy, and would end up becoming the stereotypical cat woman. I always thought my career would come first. However, recently I have decided that I might actually want to settle down - have a husband, a few kids, and enjoy life in that way. I still don't know for sure what my life will become, but I am looking forward to finding out. :)

Deidra said...

I'm not concerned with what's "normal" or not very much, although SOME aspects of "the american dream" do appeal to me. I've always known that I could never live alone, because I hate being lonely and sleeping alone in a house and it would drive me insane. I knew that even if I didn't get married, I would need to live with someone. Plans have changed, and I'm pretty secure in what I'm going to do about that now, but as for the career, I still have no idea. :)

TexasGirl said...

I don't think people necessarily plan their "American Dream." I think some people just kinda fall into it. Most people don't want to end up alone. That results in a white picket fence, 2.5 kids- whatever. Personally, I want the house. I always have. The family part- well, I'll let that happen if and when it's supposed to. In my opinion, my professional success depends entirely on myself. The white picket fence doesn't just depend on me but on whomever I end up with too. Personally, I try to plan my career path and what I want professionally. The family I can't plan so I don't try. Interesting topic/post.

Anonymous said...

The American Dream is so over done that I don't even know if it is truly a reality anymore. The idea of living a life where you come home to a house with no fighting, with 2.5 kids, and a household that is virtually perfect, it just doesn't seem like it is really ever going to happen like it is 'supposed to.' Whether you think the American Dream is real or 'True' or not, if it ever happens, let me know, because reality is that the wife doesn't stay at home anymore, women are just as important in life to have jobs as the men, and if she stays home then it sort of diminishes her importance in the household... Which isn't right.


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