Friday, July 29, 2011

An Open Letter to Anyone Who's Still Listening

Well, in the past month I've made some decisions. Some may have been stupid, some perfect, but all were a big deal and all have huge effects on the rest of my life. But it's college, isn't stuff like this bound to happen?

After three years of proclaiming that Journalism was IT, I realized it wasn't. I was falling out of love with it, and like an old flame, we had to part ways. So I quit the university newspaper before I even started, and withdrew my acceptance. I sat down on the hood of a car one late night and just thought. I thought about the now: what I needed to do, and the future: what I need to get where I'm going...wherever I want to be.

It was hard. I had a hard time accepting the rash decisions I made. But at the same time, I never make big, unexpected decisions like that. So maybe for once, it was the right thing. Maybe for once, I was going to take the right path instead of sticking with my head and traveling down a road with no heart in it at all.

For the first time I trusted my gut. And that's how I got to where I am right this moment.

Re-enrolling in my community college. One of few places I truly feel at home. Registering for education classes to see if this is something I can truly be successful at and love. Trying my hand at elementary education. I've always respected teachers more than anyone...I've always looked up to them, admired them and somewhere in the back of my stomach, wanted to be more like them. So maybe this is the right choice.

My most vivid memories begin in elementary school, I have few recollections from before that time. I remember the excitement of new school supplies in late summer, shopping around with my school supplies list. I remember the first day jitters after my mom took my picture outside before I walked to school. I recall the pure joy I felt when my teacher would read books to us, memories at recess, and learning about the world around me. I loved the excitement of learning. I loved looking up to my teacher.

Maybe someday I can give that joy and love of life and learning to someone else.

That's why I'm here making this decision. I'm going to give it a chance. I want to make a difference, and I think this could make more of an impact than any article I could write or any interview I could have. I want to make a face-to-face change, and that change starts now.



photo via (we heart it)


Chris said...

All I have to say is wow... This is extremely inspirational, and makes me want to reconsider what Im doing, or going to do just to make sure that it is the right thing that I want to be doing. I know that thinking back on the way you are Jess that you are like the teachers that I had as a kid, always wanting to have a positive influence on those children around you and I think that education can allow you to just that, be the romodel that you have always wanted to be.

violet said...

Here's wishing you all the best! With whatever you do, really. Whatever gives you passion and purpose (and would make it even so much better if you could inspire and help others to succeed). Good luck! :)


Erica said...

Speaking from my experience, I majored in Journalism. It was a Literature/Rhetoric major. I wanted to work for a newspaper like you did and I have to tell you, it is amazingly difficult to break into newspapers or magazines. Not to say you couldn't do it since you are so incredibly talented. But there is a ton of red tape and bureaucracy in publishing. After college, the internet boom was happening and I worked for a website. Then I worked in PR, then another website, than a proofreader job. All were slightly related to writing but never the newspaper job of my dreams. Would I go back in time and not major in Journalism knowing what I know now? I'm not sure. Well, actually I would have pushed myself to be a singer and dancer which is what I really wanted against my parent's wishes. I am rambling but the bottom line is you need to do what is right for your life and now is the time to change your mind once, twice, as many times as you need to. There's nothing worse than regret and if you don't choose the life you were meant to have, regret has a way of hiding in that dark corner of your mind.


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