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Wednesday, October 05, 2011

Trust.

They say that trust has to be earned, but to be honest, I think I treat it a little differently. I'm an open book; if someone asks me something I will be completely honest with them. That being said, I think I give everyone my trust until they give me reason to take it back. But what happens when the person you care about the most sacrifices your trust?

I've never really believed in second chances, but I've found myself more open to them lately. I'm giving everything my all, and it doesn't really seem to be working. I'm doing things that I said I never would, I'm being a better person, but I think it's exhausting. How many times can you trust someone and how many times can you give them chances until it all falls apart? You can sit in the car and wait for things to be right, but even if they return, will things really change? That's something you'll never know til you try, and it's all about trust.

If people are in your life, you need to be able to trust them. And if you want to keep them in your life, you'll continue to trust them. But when that trust is broken, it's the most painful feeling in the world. 

But if you are going to be with someone or involved with someone, that trust is crucial. If you have the slightest doubt about it, you are going to fail. That partnership is going to crumble. Trust is the foundation of any relationship you will have with any person you meet. You have to work at it, and you have to protect it. Trust is sacred. Once it's gone, everything you had goes with it.

So how do you get it back? When you're at that point, is there anyway to turn around? It's difficult. But do people ever really change? I'd hate to think I'm naive, but I'd hate to think I would throw anything away on a gut instinct. I would hate to give up something that means so much to me because my gut is nervous. Because facts aren't lining up. So you let your heart take over. You think you've come to a resolution. Will it be enough? Time can only tell.

I'm going to keep trusting, until all the facts are pointing to a different place. I'm going to keep trusting because my heart is telling me to. I have to keep trusting, because it feels like it's exactly what I need. I'm going to keep trusting until it completely stabs me in the back.

3 comments:

Daydream Believer said...

Trust is a tricky thing, isn't it? I think you and I are a lot alike. I trust someone wholeheartedly until they do something to break that trust. Honestly, most people will. Sometimes it's little things that don't matter in the long run, but sometimes those little things pile up into big things. You need to know when to walk away, and that's the tricky thing, especially when you love someone. Good luck, sweetness.

Erica said...

My goodness, you're such a good writer. Among other things, I worked as a proofreader and your work is always so tight and error free. I reread my own entries and find mistakes sometimes! Blogging has made everyone into a "writer", but you truly are a writer.

Trust. Wow, I can write volumes on that one word, one idea. I have always been trusting, but I've been hurt by being that way. Still I continue to trust, to believe that people will give to me what I so freely give out. That's how my brain or heart works I guess.

Katlyn said...

Your post makes me think - because I'm facing some "trusting issue". I wonder if I should go on or take back all my trust. However you tell me to follow my heart. I don't want to lose what I have but...you know, the gap. I keep a distance because I don't want to fully trust like I used to.

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