"Your ex is an ex because he's an EXample of what you don't want to be with."
"If he's your ex, it's for a reason."
Sure, you may not be dating anymore, but does that mean you stop caring altogether? If you spent so much time and gave so much of a commitment to someone, can you really give up on them, no matter what happened? I mean, if you really loved someone...you love them no matter what. Right?
It's a really tough decision. You can dump someone, hate them for a while, stop talking to them...but what happens if you can't help but come back to them? Not because you're lonely, but because you genuinely care? If you love someone, you have to love all of them. So say that I'm stupid for what I'm doing, but you can't blame me for caring too much.
So my question is, is it possible to be friends with your ex? Especially if your relationship didn't end so well. Is it possible to pick yourself back up, dust yourself off, make amends and then go back to "just friends?" Is it too tough and painful to do, or is it worth it?
I'm the kind of person who asks around when I need advice. I don't rely on one person; I ask anyone and everyone what they think. And on this subject, I'm getting 50/50. Some people say that it's a great idea: easier to cope, the friendship is saved, and maybe one day you can be back together under better terms. But the cons make me worry if they are worth the pros. Downsides: you confuse yourself and the other person. There still may be some resentment. Mixed feelings. It could end even worse than the relationship did. Can you trust them? What if old feelings come up? What do you do?
What should I do?
I want to be friends, because I genuinely care. I want him in my life. I want to be in his. Maybe we weren't meant to work out in other ways. But I can't let go of all aspects. We get each other like no one else can come close to.