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Tuesday, November 01, 2011

Late Night Thought: Over it.

It's strange; it's only been a few weeks since we stopped everything. It's only been a few weeks since the cat was let out of the bag. It's only been a few weeks since everything went to hell. But it feels like it's been months since we even existed. 

I'm at this weird point; all the memories, good and bad, are hazy. I can't really recall any specific moments from our time. Maybe I'm somehow pushing them out, but they don't come in as clear anymore. Not that I could even focus on a memory long enough to remember what happened. As soon as I try, it evades me.

Maybe that's for the best. I don't want to dwell on any of it anymore. No matter what anyone says, I'm still going to think that most of it was a lie. And I'm moving on. I'm completely and totally over it. No one believes me; it should take so much longer than this. But when it doesn't even feel like something existed in the first place, then it's fairly easy to get over something that never happened...right?

But I'm in a good spot right now. I'm doing things that are making me happy. I'm just content. Sure, I have my moments, but I think we all do. I have moments of heartbreak and confusion, but they are so much more infrequent. I'm proud of myself for picking up all of my pieces and putting myself back together. I'm happy that I'm in that better place.

I'm happy to say that I'm really over it.

Huh. Who knew it'd end up like this.

photo via (we heart it)

5 comments:

AkoustiK said...

Random bouts are okay to deal with I guess. Good to know you are happy :)

Ashton King said...

Sometimes when things end the way your relationship did, it makes it easier to move on from it. I think when we have a relationship that turns out to be based on lies, it's easy to tell ourselves that it was never real, and if it wasn't real then what is there to move on from?

Erica said...

It gets easier every day. For me, over ten years later and I still get a pang or two from the good memories. The bad ones tend to fade into the background. And maybe that's for the best. Your old loves transform into the subject of love songs. And that's can't be that bad. Good for my karaoke singing I guess :)

Anonymous said...

Make sure that you don't let all of the memories go.. even if you do believe that it all was a lie. They helped make you who you are today, and they will be nice to be able to reflect on down the line. Sounds like your a strong individual, so keep it up!

Katlyn said...

You're such a strong girl. Keep it going.

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